Wait a minute.
I’m going to call bullshit on myself in terms of that title, right out of the gate. There’s nothing magical about self care. It’s damn hard work is what it is — particularly if, like me, you struggle with it. I’m only mediocre when it comes to self-care at the best of times, let alone when I’m feeling particularly rotten like I am now.
The good news is that I’ve been thinking a lot about self care lately; what things I can do support my own mental and emotional health. Nothing huge; although Universe, if you’re listening, an all-expenses paid trip to someplace sunny and warm would be perfect right about now. Thanks. What I’ve been focusing on are the small, manageable, every day things that I can do to help myself feel better without feeling overwhelmed. Things like moving my morning run to the afternoon so I can sleep in a little bit. Maki And curling up with a movie of my choice. Some days this means allowing myself to just eat the damn chocolate without feeling guilty about it.
Yesterday morning the sun came out and as the day wore on, I found myself looking forward to getting out of the office at lunchtime to go for a short walk. Unfortunately, my morning also got very busy, and I found myself neck-deep in something when lunchtime rolled around. I resigned myself to the fact that a walk in the fresh air and sunshine, however necessary, just wasn’t going to happen. I grabbed my lunch and sat eating it at my desk, the resentment bubbling up a bit.
And then the thought occurred to me: I’m not saving any lives here. Twenty minutes out of the office wasn’t going to negatively affect my productivity, in fact, getting out for some natural light and making my body move was going to do me more good in the long run. So threw on my coat and dashed out the door. I went for a lovely walk around the neighbourhood, feeling refreshed and ready (well, more ready, I guess) to tackle the rest of the afternoon.
I know that I have a long way to go to feel back to my old self, and that I need to keep making a conscious effort to look after myself. Yeah, it’s hard work. There’s definitely no magic solution, unfortunately. The good news, however, is that spring is coming, and with it, I know that my mood and my energy levels will dramatically improve. Basically, at this point, I’m counting down the days.