The One in Which I Whine a Lot

So.

These past couple of weeks have been pretty stressful. It would seem that pretty much every area of my life has some sort of stress attached to it: work, home, my marriage, my relationship with my ex husband, finances….you name it, and I’ve probably experienced stress and anxiety because of it in the last few weeks. And it’s not just me looking for things to worry about (full disclosure: I’ve been known to do this), no, this is more than that. This is real, actual stress because of real, actual stress-y things, not just my overblown sense of drama.

Guess what? No surprise here — it sucks.

I’ve been muddling through and trying to deal with the stress as best I can. Running definitely helps. So does ice cream – that is, until I start worrying about my pants getting tight. I’m at a point now where my stress levels are causing physical symptoms. Namely, I’ve been exhausted. I’ve been hitting the sack early, and have scaled back considerably on my running mileage, and yet here I am, every morning, s-l-o-w-l-y peeling myself up out of bed, despite how early I went to bed the night before.

It’s amazing how mental and emotional stress can physically wear you out. And yet — here I am.

CBG is gone again for the weekend to spend Father’s Day with Ankle Biter. It’s our usual weekend to be alone together, which means that my girls are also away, as well. I’ve got a whole entire weekend all to myself stretching out in front of me. I haven’t decided exactly how I’m going to spend this glorious time alone, but I’m thinking early bedtimes, a couple of runs, maybe a little thrift store shopping, a nap, reading, Netflix, and visiting my friend and her new baby for some baby cuddles. And I’m hoping to be able to drink ALLLLLLLLLL the coffee.

My hope is that some time to myself – which is in short supply these days – will help me to recharge my batteries and deal with my stress in healthy ways (and maybe some unhealthy ways too, because hey, I’ve got an unfinished tub of ice cream in the freezer). Here’s the thing. Many of the things causing me stress in my life right now are outside of my control. I am powerless to do anything about them, at least not immediately. The only thing that I can actually control is me, and my reaction to this situation. My goal is to try and make the best possible choices that I can right now. I’ve gotta give myself a fighting chance, right?

One Response

  1. enjoy the solitude!

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