When life is good it’s easy to forget that there is a natural ebb and flow to love, particularly in marriage.
There are times when you love your spouse more than others. There are times when you have more patience, more romance. Times when you remember to show respect and pay attention to all the little things that are required to make a marriage run smoothly.
There are other times when these things fall by the wayside. Sometimes there is a reason — outside stress, depression, the minutiae of life and raising kids. During these times of ebb it’s sometimes easy to forget the good stuff. It’s just how life works sometimes…when it feels as though what is happening right now is all there is, and all there ever will be.
The ebb phase tests a marriage. But it can be a good wake up call; a reminder that complacency and laziness have to be kept in check. Sometimes the ebb makes the flow feel even sweeter when it finally comes back again.
It would seem that CBG and I are returning to the flow. It’s been hard won. I try not to look too closely at anything, for fear of crushing it with over-zealousness, but I can feel a shift. Laughing at the little things again, being consumed with silliness over nothing until tears squeeze out my eyes and breathing becomes near impossible. Both of us paying greater attention to the small details — holding hands, sweet kisses in the parking lot before heading into work. Patience. Understanding. This past weekend felt free and easy again, for the first time in a long time. Natural. Just the way things used to be.
It gives me hope. It reminds me that what we have is worth the work.
Our love is flowing again and it is a relief; like a sweet warm rain after a drought. And I plan on drinking it in.