There are still so many moments where I look over at CBG and am overwhelmed with happiness. Those blissful moments when everything seems completely and utterly perfect….that I know that all the struggles we endured to get here were completely worth it.
It’s not perfect. But no relationship is. I value the imperfect moments almost as much as the perfect ones; they teach me about life, love, and myself. They show me where I need to grow and how better to love him — and myself. They point me in the direction to take to make our relationship better, stronger, and dare I say – even happier than it already is.
I haven’t been writing much lately. It’s funny, how it’s actually more difficult to write about all the happy moments in our lives than it was to write when things weren’t always so blissful. I had so much more to say when I was wishing for more; when I was steeped in loneliness and longing.
Now life is a stream of so many happy moments that it’s impossible to capture them all. Again, not perfect, but perfection isn’t something that I want anyhow. Instead I prefer growth, change, a reason to strive for better. Because as happy as it all is…I still long for better. After all, its longing in our lives that gives us something to work for, isn’t it?
I’ll get back into my writing groove soon, I promise. In the coming months there will be wedding deets to share, if nothing else. Blended family goodness, mom stuff to discuss. And of course, there are always muddled thoughts and feelings to work through…I just need to once again, discipline myself to actually sit down and sort through them.
But for now I’m going to simply sit back and enjoy the bliss. It looks an awful lot like the bald guy sitting here on the couch beside me. I’m going to enjoy it for a little while longer before I start thinking about it too hard.