Long before we officially got engaged, CBG and I knew that we were going to get married. We hadn’t started planning our big day or anything, but we’d had a few discussions about what we did and didn’t want.
For starters, a traditional wedding just isn’t “us”. I mean, CBG had a traditional church wedding with his ex, and for obvious reasons, he’s doing many things a lot differently this second time around. While I didn’t have a traditional church wedding (we had a small, intimate barefoot wedding in the backyard of our home), I knew that I wanted something different for CBG and I. Something that was uniquely “us.
The first conversations were about eloping. The first suggestion from CBG was that we do something cheesy, run off and tie the knot in Vegas. We could get hitched by an Elvis impersonator! After all, there would be plenty of cheap places to stay in Vegas. Score! The more we talked about this, the more it just didn’t feel right for me. While getting a few cheesy pics with Elvis would be a whole lot of fun, I guess I kind of feel that a wedding should be a bit more of a solemn occasion. Fun, yes, but ridiculous, no.
Then, of course, talks turned to something that would definitely be more us – fun and meaningful and still us. After going on our first cruise, we toyed with the idea of whisking off down south somewhere and getting married on a lovely beach somewhere. Or better yet — on the cruise ship itself. What would be more memorable than that? And boom! The honeymoon would start the second the wedding was over.
As soon as our engagement became official and our wedding conversations were based in reality rather than fanciful dreams, I realized that while it would be fun to run off and make it all about us, there was no way that we could really do that. We’re not a young couple in love without responsibility anymore. We have four kids, and those kids are a huge part of our lives, and future going forward. CBG and I getting married is more than two people joining their lives, it is about two families blending together.
And so of course our children would need to be involved. I realized that because of our custody arrangements, we spend a good part of our lives without our kids there with us. But our wedding, because it’s a significant event in their lives as well, is something that they can’t miss out on. We will have a fun, intimate, meaningful wedding with our children there to celebrate with us.
Plans are in the works for summer of 2013. We don’t have a whole lot of details nailed down at this point, but we’re slowly working our way there. For now we’re focused on having a family holiday together, but as soon as the new year hits, we’ll be full-on in wedding planning mode. It will be intimate, family-centered, and very “us”.
Bring on 2013! I can’t wait.