So there’s this really awesome guy out there. He’s going through a bit of a rough time right now…his world is in a bit of an upheaval.
He’s looking at changing careers, moving to another city, and moving in with his fiancee and her two daughters. Those are lot of changes that he’s looking at, coming pretty much all at once. He’s getting out of his comfort zone and well…it’s making him uncomfortable. Naturally. It’s not the moving in with his woman that he’s worried about, or even changing cities. It’s the career change that’s got him thrown for a loop.
The reason it’s got him so thrown off is that he’s not at the point where he really believes in himself quite yet. At least not in this particular area. It’s sad that he doesn’t see himself the way that others see him, particularly the lady friend in his life. Because here is the thing. This guy…when he is comfortable and confident in himself and his abilities, lights up the room. People see that light in him and are drawn to it — they’re all looking and admiring and thinking, “Hey! Look at that guy! He’s awesome! I want to be around him!” They want to be around him in the hope that some of that awesomeness just might rub off on them. When he’s at his best he is intelligent, charming, warm, personable, engaging, friendly, funny, adventuresome, magnetic, motivating and incredibly capable. People want to be around him. Spend five minutes with this guy when he believes in himself and you know that you’re in the presence of someone fantastically awesome. It’s obvious to everyone around him.
He’s never seen that about himself. But his fiancee has. It’s one of the things that attracted her to him in the first place.
Right now he’s in a place where he’s allowing fear to control how he feels about himself. He’s putting a dimmer on that inner light of his and turning it down — way down — because he’s afraid that other people are going to expect too much of him and he won’t be able to deliver. But it’s precisely that approach that’s gotten him to where he is today…a man who, deep down on the inside has never truly discovered the depths of his own strength. He’s never really allowed himself to be challenged like this — not in this area of his life. He fails to really appreciate all of the other areas where he’s been able to meet challenges — like fatherhood, the death of his mother, rebuilding a stronger relationship with his father, maintaining (well!) a long distance relationship for over three and a half years. He has flourished in all of these areas because he has believed in himself.
But if he could just believe in himself — fully — in all areas of his life, then truly, he could do anything he wanted to. Others see that in him too, not just his “biased” fiancee (as he calls her), who, by the way, sees his amazing capabilities despite the fact that she also sees his worst qualities as well. No, he’s not perfect. But fortunately being awesome doesn’t mean being perfect. The great thing about being human is that you get to be imperfectly awesome. Which he is…in so many ways.
He needs to get out of his own way and turn up the brightness on that awesome switch of his and not allow fear to hold him back. There are so many awesome things that are just waiting for him. If he can just figure out how to make fear his bitch, then look out world…there will be no holding him back.