Goodbyes Suck

Six a.m. Monday morning goodbyes really FUCKING SUCK.

I had a tough goodbye this morning – the toughest in a while. I put on a brave face for CBG as best I could for our six a.m. goodbye, though. He’s the one who has to get in the car and drive away, after all. That’s gotta take a certain amount of emotional fortitude, and I never want to make that any worse for him than it needs to be. It’s difficult enough.

But once he was gone and I hit the shower, all bets were off. I had a good long cry…the heaving, ugly, red-faced, snotty-nosed kind. The kind that it’s best your man doesn’t see anyhow.

Though it sure would have been good to have his arms around me while I did. There’s nothing worse than crying like that alone.

But…the goodbye is over for another visit. Nothing left to do now but slap on those big girl panties and keep trucking forward.

Happy Monday.

11 Responses

  1. Man it’s tough when you’ve got to put on those big-girl panties isn’t it? *hugs* Sending strength your way!

  2. I was never good at holding that kind of cry in. It usually started the second JME put his suitcase in the car and ended well after he was gone.

    You’re a very strong person but don’t forget that it’s okay to give in once in a while.

    Personally, I think it’s better for you and your body to get that kind of cry out once in a while. As crummy as it feels during, I always feel better afterwards.

    • I definitely struggle finding a balance there between being strong and “letting it out”. But where he has to jump in his car and head straight back (to work) there is no time for long, drawn-out goodbyes. In some ways that’s a little easier, but it does require me to be strong for the both of us.

      Bah.

  3. Goodbyes DO suck. I tried my best not to cry when I said bye to M at the airport yesterday, but let some tears out once he hugged me. I couldn’t help it. He admitted to some tears himself after he left…sniff. So, while I can’t fully relate to the LDR thing, in a tiny way, I can. But the best part about the goodbye? The worst is over…right?

    • I’ll be okay. We’ve done this so many times I know exactly what to expect. All I need to do is focus on the here and now and I’ll make it through it. ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. Um….. yep. That was me, yesterday.

    And as you’ve told me countless times, the goodbye means we get a really awesome hello, right?

    ((hugs))

  5. Awww, I truly frowned in sadness when I read this. But I like what T said about the awesome hello. Try to hold onto that thought! *hugs*

  6. Damn those stupid big girl panties that we have to put on. It sucks. Sometimes I think being single is difficult but man the situation you and CBG are in has to be way more difficult. It’s so hard when you can’t be with the one you love on a regular basis.

    • It’s tough, for sure. But then when we’re together again I tend to forget about all the tears in between. Some people are worth it, I guess.

      But lord knows I’d NEVER do this for anyone but him. ๐Ÿ˜‰

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