Update: The New Job

So I’m on week three of the new job. I’ve actually been liking it — a lot. I’m able to train in such a way that I’m being eased into things, so for the most part, I haven’t felt very overwhelmed.

My coworkers seem okay. I can’t imagine that any of us will ever be good friends, but I won’t mind spending every day with these people.

Yesterday, however, I found myself making a number of small mistakes. I felt like I had a few too many questions. I found myself thinking about how I don’t yet have a clear concept of “the bigger picture” in terms of how things work. For the first time, I found myself feeling incompetent and overwhelmed.

It had to happen eventually, right?

Yesterday I found myself telling a friend about my new job. I said, “It doesn’t fill my soul, but it doesn’t eat away at it, either.”

For the six months prior to this, I did have a job that filled my soul. Or at least aligned with some of my strong personal beliefs. Sure, that job wasn’t perfect either, but it was the kind of job that made me feel like I was making a difference in the world. I’d decided during that time that this was the career path I wanted to follow – a career that filled my soul (not necessarily my bank account) and that at the end of the day left me feeling like I’d made some sort of a difference.

And yet here I am…not actively helping to destroy the planet, but not exactly making some sort of useful difference, either. And I’m not sure how I feel about that right now.

Of course, with all my musings this week, it’s no wonder I’m poking at my career choices. After all, I wasn’t truly fulfilled being a stay-at-home mom, either.

I wonder what it would take for me to be completely happy?

4 Responses

  1. Follow your soul. Trust me. My job is a place I have to go every day. A paycheck. Every day a piece of my sould withers up and dies. The work isn’t hard, or too much, it’s just well, not what makes my soul happy. Which in turn drags me down in other areas. Vicious cycle.

  2. When you figure it out let me know…I’m currently working towards a nursing degree, and every day I’m wondering why?

  3. This ‘soul searching’ is very good!

    I saw something recently from Abraham-Hicks that helped clear things up for me. It said that when you find something isn’t suiting you… or when someone does something that you don’t approve of… or when things just aren’t going right….

    Decide what you DO want and focus on that!

    Visualize a soul fulfilling job. Visualize what you’d prefer. See it. Believe it. Allow it.

    You WILL find it. Trust.

  4. Glad to hear the new gig is going relatively smoothly and I’m sure some of the bumps are just the new job adjustment and while it may not be fulfilling yet, hopefully it will soon. And actually, I have learned not to expect my job to fulfill my life, which in one way may sound sad, but in another, I think only WE fulfill our lives, our jobs are just complementary to that. But that may partially be because I need a new job 😉

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