Recently I took my girls out to a place that I haven’t been with them for about two and a half years. It was a place we used to go all the time, but for a number of reasons, I have chosen not to go there in all this time. But recently, on a Saturday when I desperate for something to do with my girls, I decided we should just go.

While we were there, I was bombarded with a number of different emotions. One thing that I really thought about a lot was how, when my ex and I first split up, I rebelled strongly against the person that I was when we were together. There were many parts of myself that I had allowed to grow and even actively nurtured, that I didn’t like. When we split, I really didn’t like the person that I had gradually morphed into during the decade that we had been together.

For the last two and a half years, I’ve been on an active journey to discover who I truly am; to let go of those things that I didn’t like, and to foster those things that I did like. In the process of turning away from the things I didn’t like, I realized (while in this place that held a lot of emotion and “baggage” for me) that in that process, I also left behind many valid, true and wonderful parts of myself as well. I didn’t know how to compartmentalize everything and separate the negative from the positive. Hell….maybe even some of those things I called negative aren’t so negative after all. I have to be open to all of the possibilities.

The good news is…I am open.  One of the biggest lessons that I feel like The Universe is hammering me with (lately more so than ever) is that nothing is black and white. I mean….intellectually that was something that I always knew, but lately I feel it…right down to my very core. Okay, Universe, I GET it already! You’ve got my full attention.

It’s time to celebrate me. All of me.

After spending some time at that particular location with my girls, I walked away remembering how much I loved it there. It was a part of me that I had denied and repressed for a very long time. It’s time to embrace it again…embrace it and love it as a part of who I am.

3 Responses

  1. I remember doing this. There are actually still places that I still avoid due to memories I dont want to face!

    Well done for doing it though!

  2. I’ve done this with things too! Not just places! I’m starting to embrace the me that I was before I was married and the me that was married too. She wasn’t so bad after all. 🙂

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