Believing The Lies

Chances are, you’re believing at least one lie about yourself right now.

We all  have things that we choose to believe about ourselves. Somewhere along the way, likely in childhood, someone (maybe our parents?) decided certain things about us, based on their observations. “He’s a procrastinator”, “she’s lazy”, “she’s bad at math”, “he’s not much of an athlete”. Eventually, when we hear things like this about ourselves enough, we start to believe them.

The thing is, these things are only true because we make the choice to believe them.

For example, I used to believe that I was lazy. I was a bit of a “bookworm” as a kid. Also, because of the huge age gap between myself and my siblings, I was raised basically as an only child, so I grew up without siblings to play with. So I spent most of days inside, curled up with a book, reading away. These things caused someone along the way to label me as “lazy”. And for a long time, I chose to believe that description. It was a handy excuse. “I can’t do that because I’m lazy.”  “I would do that, if I weren’t so lazy.” You get the idea.

I see people around me doing it, too – choosing to believe those lies. There are some things about us that aren’t a choice. I will always be short. I will always have blue eyes. But so many other things are choices. Like laziness and procrastination and perfectionism and a million other traits.

Somewhere along the way, I started acting in non-lazy ways. Like raising two kids as a stay at home mom. And running. And then being a single working mom. Turns out, I’m not lazy at all. I wonder sometimes what my life would look like if I continued to believe those lies. I’d still be trapped in that narrow little box, living someone else’s idea of who I was.I’d still be choosing to act in lazy ways. I would still have a handy excuse preventing me from getting other there, taking chances, and living my life. There would be so many things that I would be missing out on right now.

So many things about us in life are the way they are because of choices that we make. The beauty about choices is that we are always free to choose something else. I made a choice not to believe that I was lazy. I choose to get out there and be a runner. I choose to get up every morning and accomplish a multitude of tasks through the course of the day. I choose to be the person that I want to be, not the person that someone else has decided that I am.

Hell, I’m not perfect. I still some days fall into the trap of believing things about myself that aren’t true simply because it’s easier that way. Because if we believe those negative things, then we have the perfect excuse not to challenge ourselves, don’t we? And facing those challenges can be a scary thing sometimes. But it’s those challenges that help us to grow and change and ultimately be better people…which is the whole point of this, isn’t it?

What about you? What lies are you believing about yourself right now? What can you do to challenge those lies and be the person that you want to be?

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6 Responses

  1. Ya know, wow, so so true! I always say ‘i’m not a natural runner’ but ya know, so many people AREN’T. There are few that just glide along so much more effortlessly than the average person. They’re called Olympians ;-) Haha. Seriously, though, I do that to myself too, just say I am not something (I am not a runner, I am not creative, etc) but that just ingrains that ‘lie’ more than what it is. Good perspective this Monday morning my dear!

  2. Yes, exactly. Reading a little book called The Four Agreements was the first time I realized there were things I believed about myself that weren’t true. I struggle with that, as jobo mentioned, when it comes to athletics too.

    The most difficult challenge is FINDING the lies we believe. Sometimes, they’ve become so ingrained that we don’t even know what core belief is behind them.

    Great post girlfriend!

  3. My Ex said for so many years that I was a terrible cook. I didn’t cook like his mother, so it was “wrong” and after 15 years I believed it. I still struggle with doubts about my abities in the kitchen, even though my kids and BLT always enjoy what I make.

  4. This just happened to me this morning, actually. My husband was pushing me to run faster on our run because he believes that I can but that I doubt that I can so I don’t push as hard as I could. To that I said “but I’m not a fast runner.” Um – why do I immediately say that? Just because I don’t run all that fast NOW doesn’t mean I can’t learn to run faster. It’s so easy to make those snap judgments/reactions vs. saying you know what? Maybe I CAN run faster, do xxx, xxx or xxx. Great point.

  5. [...] me that my blog friend over at Sunshine on my Shoulder wrote something similar on her blog. About “believing the lies” – those half-truths or “lies” about ourselves that we choose to believe.  She’s right – [...]

  6. [...] Chances are, you're believing at least one lie about yourself right now. We all  have things that we choose to believe about ourselves. Somewhere along the way, likely in childhood, someone (maybe our parents?) decided certain things about us, based on their observations. "He's a procrastinator", "she's lazy", "she's bad at math", "he's not much of an athlete". Eventually, when we hear things like this about ourselves enough, we start to believe … Read More [...]

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