So I haven’t really been talking much about my whole “attitude makeover” that I embarked upon recently.
There’s not a whole lot to report, really. With the exception of letting my crazy hang out for CBG to trip over on the weekend, I’d have to say that making an effort to remain positive has actually been working. I’m not saying that I’m bouncing around spending every day overjoyed at the very prospect of being alive. But on the flip side, I haven’t been moping around and feeling sorry for myself because my life sucks, either. There’s no grand revelation or moment of perfect clarity or anything like that…but overall there seems to be a general upward trend.
I’d like to think that’s progress.
Hell…it’s definitely progress from where I was two years ago, medicated and still barely able to do the basics to keep myself afloat.
I’m still working on it for sure, though. Having my mom here all this week (which will be another post for another day) is certainly challenging to my ability to remain positive and upbeat. I love my mom…but I didn’t once describe her as an emotional vampire for nothing.
But that’s okay. Five years ago, the prospect of spending five days and nights with my mother would have sent me into an emotional tailspin. These days, for any number of reasons, I know that I will be able to handle it.
And maybe even smile in the middle.