Things The Internet Taught Me This Week

It’s been quite the week online for me this week, kids. It’s been…shall we say…educational.

In no particular order, here are some things that the Internet taught me this week. Maybe it’s stuff you all already knew, but dang,  this was news to this gal. And if you’re learning something new today, too: you’re welcome.

1. Brad Pitt is FIFTY YEARS OLD.

So you’ve probably heard by now that apparently Brangelina finally made it legal over the weekend. He (eventually) decided he liked it and so he put a ring on it. Or something. The one article I read about this (because really, I don’t care whether they’re married or not) is that Brad Pitt is fifty. Fifty.

Let’s stop for a minute to think about this long and hard, shall we?

50? Seriously? How did this happen?

50? Seriously? How did this happen?

Now, if I’d been stopped on the street and asked to guess his age, and I thought long and hard about it, I’m sure I would have come up with a number pretty close to that. But dang. FIFTY. How is that even possible? In my 40 year old brain, this is where Brad Pitt is forever frozen:

Brad PittSigh.
2. Hello Kitty is NOT a cat.

File this one under “I don’t really care.” But I do find it pretty entertaining how up in arms the Internets are about this one. Seems like the Internet needs to rage about something. Why not this?

kittyNOT a cat? Really? If I actually cared, my mind just *might* be blown. You fooled us all, Sanrio. Good on you, I guess?

 

3. Tony Soprano didn’t die in the finale. Or wait. Maybe he did. We still don’t know for sure.

7 years later and people are still talking about this. Now that's good TV, people.

7 years later and people are still talking about this. Now that’s good TV, people.

I loved The Sopranos when it originally aired. When the series finale aired, I was riveted. The ending seemed clear to me — Tony got whacked.

But then early this week the headlines were screaming, “Tony Soprano didn’t die in the series finale!!” But then later the show’s creator kind of took it back again. The official word went back to the original explanation: Tony living or dying wasn’t really the point.

*cough* Bullshit *cough*

Spoiler alert: Tony Soprano is dead. There. Conversation over. You’re welcome.

 

4. There is a Facebook page dedicated to Jon Hamm’s penis.

Say what?

Say what?

I know, I know…..2007 called, welcoming me to the party. I just started watching Mad Men this week. I was home alone, looking for something to watch, and decided to give it a try. I’m not yet finished the first season and I am loving it.

And then this week I found out that Jon Hamm is rumored to have some…um…special assets. Or rather, one special asset in particular. So special in fact, it has its very own Facebook page. And now, I’ll be the first to admit that a big Bavarian Beefstick doesn’t really impress this gal. But….you know…natural human curiosity and all, and I’m finding myself face to face with Mr. Hamm’s Pantswombat.

I may be a little late to this party, but the important part is that I'm here now.

I may be a little late to this party, but the important part is that I’m here now.

I think I’ll keep watching Mad Men. Thanks.

 

Oh, Internet. How I love you sometimes.

100 Happy Days (Of a Different Kind)

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A few months back I made the decision to go on a running streak. I decided that I would run at least 2 km every single day. At the time I made the decision, I wasn’t sure how long I would be able to keep up the streak, but somewhere in the back of my mind, I thought that maybe 30-ish days or so would be good.

When I hit the 30 day mark, I somehow didn’t feel “finished”. So I continued the streak, thinking that perhaps 40 would be good. Particularly symbolic since I turned 40 on my birthday this year.

Still, when 40 hit, it didn’t seem like enough. So I kept going, without any real end point in sight. All I knew was that it had to be an even number (because my obsessive-compulsive side wouldn’t allow me to stop on day 57 or 61 or some such nonsense.

Yesterday I hit Day 100.

100 solid days of running. During that time I ran anywhere from two to thirty kilometres. Most days I did something in the 5-10 km mark. I have a few random thoughts about my 100 day running streak.

- Damn 100 days goes by quickly. TOO quickly. Dear Life: you can slow down anytime, mmkay?

- I’m a pretty healthy person! Not once in 100 days was I sick and couldn’t run.

- I really do love running. Yes, yes, I knew this before, before the past 100 days really reminded me of that. I.love.it. Love. Truly.

- I never regret seeing a sunrise. I’ve seen a lot of them over the past 100 days. Each one is different and beautiful in its own way. I’ve come into my morning-person-ness

- My body is happiest when I am running regularly. I deal with a lot of aches and pains. Part of it is getting older, yes, but I have a lot of neck/upper back problems thanks to a car accident in my 20s. Even though I’ve been pushing my body these past 100 days, it feels better than it has in a long time. I’m more relaxed, I’m stronger. My muscles are singing from all the blood pumping through them daily.

- It feels good to challenge myself. There were some days that it was damn tough to drag myself out for an early morning run. But whenever I thought about just staying snuggled under the blankets, I reminded myself that I didn’t want to break this running streak because of laziness. No, when I decide that the streak has ended, I want it to be a purposeful decision.

- In the past, I allowed laziness to hold me back too often. Running is very much a mental game as much as it is a physical one, and more often than not, in the past, I allowed my brain to get in the way of me getting out for a run. Once staying home was no longer an option, I didn’t have that mental block there to stand in my way.

- The most rewarding runs are often on the days when it was toughest to get out the door. Nothing like that sense of accomplishment after pushing through those feelings of “BUT I DON’T WANNA!!!”

- On the tough days, the toughest part is usually just getting out the door. I would bargain with myself that all I needed to do was 2 km in order to fulfill my goal. There were actually very few days (less than 5) when I only did the 2 km…most of the time, once I got out there and my blood started pumping, I wanted to go further, and so I did.

- Not having the time is a shitty excuse for not exercising. Many mornings this summer I was up at 4:45-5:00. A little bit later on the weekends and during vacation week, but because I had made running a priority, I never had the “but I don’t have time” excuse for not getting out there. Especially since my minimum was 2 km…less than 15 minutes! Who doesn’t have time for at least a 15 minute workout?

So yeah. It’s been an interesting 100 days. I’m not sure where all of this is going, but I will mention this: This morning, Day 101 I got up and ran 10 km.

Staying home this morning hadn’t even crossed my mind.

It Could Have Been Me

Every now and again the death of a celebrity really gets to me. Robin Williams is one of them. It was a shock when I read last night that he had passed; I was even more shocked when I saw that the cause of death appears to be suicide.

The first thing I thought about was the fact that not that long ago, I too, struggled with depression. To the point where I began entertaining thoughts that maybe the world would be better off without me. I’d like to say that this was long before I ever had children, that was I young and foolish, and didn’t have anything to live for.

Except that it wasn’t.

My daughters were 3 and 5 years old. They very much needed me in their lives, but my thinking was far too clouded by Depression to realize this. Life was hard — so hard. And I was exhausted. I felt like I didn’t have any fight left in me. It was becoming increasingly clear to me (in my depression-muddled brain) that there was no one I could count on for help.

And that’s when the thoughts began. Thoughts that they would be so much better off without them in their lives. That I was only doing more harm than good. That there was nothing left in life worth fighting for. That no one wanted me around anyhow.

Depression is a liar. A very convincing one.

One Year

In the blink of an eye a whole year has passed since CBG and I said “I do”.

365 days. It almost doesn’t seem possible. Life is speeding by, at a pace much faster than I would like. I’m doing my best to slow down and enjoy each moment as it comes, but that seems to be easier said than done.

The past year hasn’t been perfect. There have been arguments, ugly moments, festering wounds, tears, weakness.

There has also been love, romance, laughter, silliness, adventure, joy.

This year has also seen hugs, forgiveness, growth, learning. Compassion. Understanding. Compromise.

We are more a team today than we were one year ago, as we have faced challenges, learned, grown, loved and laughed. I believe more than ever that it is through the challenges in life that we grow and improve. And as a couple, CBG and I face life’s challenges and become better for it. Through our imperfect moments we have learned what unconditional love really means.

I don’t know what the future holds in store for us. But if the past year is any indication, I have a feeling that we’re just going to keep getting better.

I love you, CBG, more today than yesterday. And more today than I did 365 days ago. I feel so grateful for all that we have — imperfections and all.

lefurgey-132

People Who Touch Our Lives

I have an email chain saved from a former yoga teacher of mine saved in a folder, tucked away where I don’t see it often.

Only if I go looking for it. Which I sometimes do, like this morning. Then I pull it up and read it, and am instantly transported back to a tiny sliver of my life almost 2 years ago.

I think about this former yoga teacher of mine often, surprisingly. Sometimes I think I see her in a crowd of people at the Farmer’s Market, or someone’s smile reminds me of her. I think of her every time I do downward dog. It was she who taught me how to ensure I get the pose just right; I follow her advice every time I do it. And every single time I do, I think of her. She had a ready smile and a gentle, giving spirit. I always noticed the calm that seemed to surround her. I guess maybe it was that whole “yoga teacher vibe”.

It’s been about a year since her sudden, unexpected death and I still find myself thinking about her regularly. It’s always so shocking when someone is taken so quickly and so young. It’s a stark reminder that life is fleeting, unpredictable. None of know how much time we have left. If we’re lucky, we will get long, happy lives.

Not everyone is so fortunate. And though she may have been taken from the world far too soon, far too young, this woman has undoubtedly touched many lives. Like mine. A tiny sliver of a person who made only the briefest of appearances in her life. Even though she’s no longer here, she still inspires me to be a better person. The kind of person who brightens the lives of others, if only with just a warm smile.

I just hope that she knew how special she was.

Busting Out of My Comfort Zone

As part of my vow to embrace life a little more and focus on The Stuff That Truly Matters, I’ve been thinking a lot about my personal comfort zone and how I need to push myself out of it a little more often than I have been. I know for me, too much comfort leads to complacency and just plain old fashioned laziness. I do better when I’m pushing myself just a little bit. After all, it’s only through life’s challenges that we grow and become better people.

My running is a perfect example. I’ve been running a lot these past 7 months or so. Ever since this year began and I promised myself that I would focus more on running (what with not having a wedding plan and all), I’ve been doing a good job of getting out there and hitting the pavement on a regular basis. It’s been good for me on a number of different levels.

Up until recently I was going out there and basically just doing what I felt like in terms of my runs. I haven’t been pushing myself to go further, to be faster, or be stronger. Granted, these things have been happening anyhow, slowly and gradually, but not in any big way. No, in order to be able to run further, I need to push myself to run longer distances, to go a little bit further than I feel comfortable doing. In order to get faster, I need to hit up some hill training. I need to push myself to actually run faster than it feels comfortable for me. I’ve been focusing on these things a little more lately and I’ve been rewarded by feeling stronger and faster. Yes, it sucks to push myself at the time that it’s happening, but in the long run I’m happy that I did it.

The same applies to all aspects of life. In friendships, in my job, in my marriage. In all of these areas if I continue to happily hang out in my comfort zone, there’s no way that these things will challenge me and help me to improve. And if we’re not improving, if we’re not learning and growing, then what’s the point of life?

Breaking out of our comfort zones is never easy. It’s…uncomfortable. But when you feel that old familiar discomfort arising, all that means is that you need to keep pushing forward. That’s exactly what I intend to do.

challenge&change

The Stuff That Truly Matters

I’ve written recently about CBG and I have been going through a bit of a “low period” together lately. I don’t even know if “low period” is really an apt description; it’s one of those things that has been difficult to define.

We’ve just lost a bit of the spark we once had. And I’m not even just talking about that old “marital spark” either (though that’s certainly part of it). I’m actually talking about life in general. We’ve been allowing life to…wear us down. Just a little bit. We’ve been so caught up in the details and obligations of life, that we’ve allowed certain things to fall by the wayside. Things that not so long ago, played a much bigger role in our lives.

Fun.

Spontaneity.

Passion.

Creativity.

Enthusiasm. 

Joy.

We’ve been just going through the motions in a lot of areas, allowing the practical, un-fun, un-passionate parts of life become bigger than they need to be. To the point where we often find ourselves so worn out at the end of the day, or week, that we just don’t have the time or the energy for The Stuff That Truly Matters.

And I’ll be honest, this is not the life that I want. I don’t want to be one of those people who just goes through the motions of life, with only the smallest glimpses of fun and passion. Because honestly, it’s not like I have huge, unrealistic expectations. I want a life that includes daily laughter. Fun experiences. The occasional adventure and memorable moments. I want to formulate goals and work to achieve them. I want to inspire others, if even in just a small way. I want to embrace creativity. I want the kind of contentment that comes from doing good and loving others. From challenging myself in all ways.

These are not impossible goals. But they were quickly becoming impossible if CBG and I stay on the path that we’ve started down. A path that places a little too much importance on things we “should” do. A path that requires so much mental and emotional energy that there’s not enough left for all the other stuff. The Stuff That Truly Matters. Because sure, having a clean bathroom is great and all, but I’m not going to remember all those times that the bathroom was completely spotless and there weren’t any dirty dishes in the sink. What I will remember are the adventures that were had, the joy that was felt, and the zest for life that my husband and I continued to cultivate throughout our lives.

From here on in, I vow to seek out passion, inspiration, joy, creativity and spontaneity wherever possible, and be just enough of a responsible grown up to take care of the important stuff, and remain a curious, enthusiastic kid at heart for everything else.

Because life is too short to spend it constantly cleaning the bathroom. After all, it’s only going to get dirty again.

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